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Update and Insights from today's networking event

I've been joining a number of networking and educational events online since i first looked at this process, making a further effort to attend now i've started the process.  

Today's event was a nationwide meet up for Prospective Adopters and was run in the evening for about two hours. There were a lot of people who joined (>30) and this included a number of returners at various stages, including two who have already had children placed with them. It was lovely to hear about the other end of the tunnel. 

I've been told last week that my end of stage one meeting is now scheduled to go ahead next week!! (I haven't had any indications of concerns, so am hoping that it should be a good meeting. That said, i don't know how under pressure the agency are for whether i'll be able to have the same social worker for stage two or if there is expected to be a bit of a wait..)

There seemed to be quite a few who were at a similar stage of the process, who talked about needing very different levels of information at the stages so far. 

We discussed_

  • the need for the certificate from your formal matching panel, which is used for your workplace to sort out adoption leave, as well as for the adoption order at the later stages.
  • that with covid absences and backlogs, they’re having to pull social workers from the adoption service into the front line at the moment. It's not unusual at the moment for there to be a delay between stage one and stage two. 
  • the guilt of looking at matching profiles and turning down those who weren't right for you, whilst also being aware that this might mean some going into care if they haven't yet been adopted.
  • the difficulty of writing an initial contact on Linkmaker (you may remember this as a website to help you match. It operates in a very similar way to a dating website with the profiles looking for mutual interest between adopter and the social worker/care worker for the potential adoptees). People also noted that people around them would get excited, but it's difficult when you can get attached to the profile(s) you've read and then if it doesn't work out, you have to allow yourself to grieve.
  • your profile on Linkmaker is very important. You are looking to really sell yourself in that space. It can feel very strange, but you are asked to try to see it like a job interview and really sell yourself as the right person, pull things through from your Potential Adopter Report. Put a video up. I'm hoping i get to see some examples before i get to this point!
  • there are webinars on the AdoptionUK site giving tips for matching panel. A couple of tips, discussed tonight, were to pull out all the positives from the PAR form in advance. If the panel session is virtual then you can put post-it’s up behind the screen. It's likely they'll ask about how you’ve found the process and what networking has been done. This is why as i go through the process, i need to keep a log of any training and networking that i'm completing.
A couple of book recommendations were made; The body keeps a score / The body says no.
I'm currently reading 'Raising Turnip' which is a memoir by a Single adopter. I'll try to remember to put some commentary back on it later. The next book in the queue is currently The Primal Wound.

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