What's next? (officially)

So next week, my social worker will give a call to go through expected timings etc. In the meantime I thought it's probably useful to share what the websites say

https://www.first4adoption.org.uk/the-adoption-process/matching-finding-the-right-child-for-your-family/

It is unlikely that you will meet the child until after the match is formally approved. However it is now fairly normal that videos of the children in their foster homes will be shown to you during this exploratory phase. You may also meet the Medical Adviser of the child’s agency to help you understand the implications of any known medical information. Once you all agree that a suitable child has been identified your adoption agency, together with the child’s agency will write an Adoption Placement Report for the matching panel. This report will include an Adoption Support Plan which outlines the support that the child’s agency will provide depending on the known needs of the child. The match will then be presented to the adoption panel of the child’s agency.

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Useful information for Friends and Family

Have had some questions around this, so thought worth sharing this https://info.adoptmatch.com/words-matter-adoption-terminology I've tried to bring together the resources I could find for friends and family. I've put the ones i think are probably top of the list starred and in bold blue to help you work out which are probably easiest/best ones to take a look at. * How family and friends can support new adopters - stepbystep (first4adoption.org.uk) ( 2 A4 pages - above ) * 10 Things Adoptive Parents Wish Their Friends And Family Understood | HuffPost UK Parents (huffingtonpost.co.uk) - Short article * Before I Arrive (paperback edition) by Helen Townsend | Adoption UK Charity - excellent small book that i ended up getting a couple of copies for to share with different friends and family. Adoption uk factsheet 12 - supporting prospective adopters with a new placement june 2013.pdf (www.nhs.uk) Ten Tips for Supporting Your Family and Friends in Adoptive F...

thanks.... it's the trauma

"What a really well behaved little one ..." is a frequent comment about my little one. Sometimes this is meant in a nice way, sometimes this is means that the speaker is feeling overwhelmed/judged for the fact their little one(s) have more typical reactions to instructions at this age. Unfortunately, this is one where nothing you say can help them to feel better. The truth is 'thanks.... it's the trauma', but that's not really the sensible thing to share. What does it look like? - Doing what she's told - not showing when she is angry / upset openly at the time (then reacting later/looking for me to recognise it*) - sitting and waiting quietly when others might be jumping about - saying "I'm sorry" when something is not their fault - ... and more (that i'll need to add to later!) *What this means is that i find my own social battery running down much quicker than i was previously used to, because i use a lot of my energy looking for ...

little jumps

Little one is about to be 4... This means I'll be on some manic birthday planning after this. Figured I'm normally writing about the process, so today I'll share the latest for little one. She's also been going through a development jump. She's (successfully ) dressing herself without me and her writing is getting much clearer. She's exploring humour (ok, her jokes are mainly funny for the absurdity at this point). A month ago, if you asked what she wanted to be when she grew up, the answer was 'big'. Now, she's saying a doctor or an astronaut (depending on when in you ask). A lovely vtec laptop was gifted by friends a while ago and it seemed like time to let her explore it last week... Two days later, she was typing out her own name! Considering we were initially talking about what delays there may be for her language and speech, this is an extra achievement :) She had been still going to bed with a milk bottle until recently. This had moved to wat...

Sing in the rain

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