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Regression

I saw this post from Mamaduke today and it felt fortuitous timing to share and expand upon (https://www.instagram.com/p/CygkbQ3sLaQ/?igshid=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng== )

I mentioned in Trauma and tips for family & friends (alwayssingintherain.blogspot.com) that It is fairly usual for adoptive children to act younger than their actual age and i would need to respond to the age they show. This might vary through a day, but i need to allow for that regression so that they can feel that safe space. 

It took a little while for little one to settle in enough for this to start coming through. It was really the second meet up with her foster family that kicked in some of this behaviour to a more noticeable level. Before that we hadn't seen any toilet training regression, but that then came into play at this point as something she could control and I'd also see other behaviours - wanting me to feed her more for example. She's struggling with the loss of her foster family/friends in that area. She'll answer about her feelings recognising that she's happy and sad and angry at the same time - recognising this feels impressive to me, but i recognise that this is trauma and training. She'll stress that she is happy with her home, but is sad that they are 'gone' and that she's not at their house. Her recognition of feelings was evident when discussing the toilet training regression too - she was able to react with her explanation that she was missing her foster mum, though not able to explain more than that. The avoidant aspects come out here then, trying to change the subject and looking away. 

Other examples/ explanations of regression in adoption:

- Regression | Adoption Adventures (podbean.com)
- Regression after adoption | What is it & why? | UK ADOPTION - YouTube
- Regression – adoption:thebearfacts (wordpress.com)


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